by Alexandra Chloe Caloracan
TRIGGER WARNING: MENTAL HEALTH ISSUE
"Dahil lang sa batang 'to, na-open up 'yong utak ko regarding sa acceptance ng psychiatric needs..." These were Mr. Ricky Ducas Jr.'s words as he tells us the story of a Grade 5 student who sparked the formation of Anxiety and Depression Support Group Baguio City.
This was a child who suffered in silence as he battled his inner demons; a kid, who was supposed to enjoy his childhood years. He was only a child. For Ricky, this grade 5 student is one of the many faceless faces of mental health in our society. And Ricky is one of them, too.
Mr. Ricky Ducas Jr., like any other person - whether for yourself, for your kids or your grandkids--- dreamt of becoming a doctor. For Ricky, it was a dream of the family. Growing up, lab coats and stethoscopes fancy him. Becoming a doctor meant fulfilling the promises of his grandparents. He even described himself as a ‘frustrated doctor’.
However, the ultimate aspiration was cut short when his Lolo, his supposed finance support system passed away. It was difficult to continue a dream when financial support has stopped. A bitter reality, that if not everyone, most of us, surely know. But for Ricky, this dream may have taken a different road, still, he was willing to take a similar road, but not the same endpoint.
Ricky took up nursing, his supposed pre-med course. Due to the sudden turn of events after his undergraduate studies, Ricky continued his master’s degree major in Maternal and Child Nursing.
What happened next in the chapter of his life was unexpected. Let's just say, "life indeed happens" to some of us. Ricky was 32 when he was diagnosed with panic and anxiety disorder.
Unlike before, society can now talk about mental disorders openly and without fear. However, there is still a stigma surrounding the issue of mental health. People may talk about it but still have difficulties in grasping the idea of mental illness.
Crazy. Lazy. Sluggish. It's all in the mind. Seeking for attention. Or the famous, "You're already successful, why are you even depressed?" Perhaps for Ricky, the most frustrating thing about his condition was that he was a nurse. Both a blessing and a curse. No, scratch that. It is not even a blessing. It is a paradox of choosing to hold on and wanting to let go. As a nurse, Ricky could not believe the symptoms he was feeling, at first. Fear of death. The mind does his actions, no control of what his body wants. As a nurse, his immediate response was to self-diagnose himself. "What could go wrong?" he said. He is a medical practitioner after all. But there lies the problem. Ricky realized that his condition was not just a simple problem. He needed a different kind of professional help.
Admittedly, he cannot accept the fact that someone like him, a medical professional, had that condition. What's worse is that the environment where he works at triggers his condition severely. His firsthand witnesses at death prompt his triggers. The empathy for the families of the bereaved strengthens as it develops into a manic feeling.
"Kakaiba", just like what he describes. "Kakaiba 'yung feeling niya kasi 'di ko makontrol 'yong dini-dictate ng utak ko sa ginagawa ng kamay at paa ko. Bigla na lang darating 'yong thought na tumalon... tapos biglang 'yong reflexes mo gagalaw..." This was the sign that Ricky needed to get help. However, due to the communication barrier in China, where he was then deployed, Ricky had to go home in the Philippines to have himself checked thoroughly. He then discovered that he had a condition that most people have too. But even the process of getting treatment was a tough journey.
In one of his speeches, Ricky explained the rigorous process of getting psychiatric help during his trip to the Philippines, where he had to write a letter for his condition in case he had a panic attack, and during his stay in the Philippines wherein he almost had to wait for 3 months for an available psychiatrist.
These are the lengths that people with mental illnesses have to go through just to be treated. This is just a single story of the hundreds of faces of mental health here in the Philippines. And Ricky is fortunate enough to address his condition whereas most people do not even know that mental illness is already creeping up into their lives.
Currently, Ricky is taking up his Doctorate studies while working in his field of expertise in the Intensive Care Unit. He is also the founder of Anxiety and Depression Support Group Baguio City.
This started when Ricky gave a personality development talk in an elementary school in Tuba, Benguet. One Grade 5 student talked to Ricky about ending his life. At such a young age, the kid is already experiencing such thoughts. For Ricky, it was something that should be addressed thoroughly. Thus, the start of his support group in Baguio City.
Ricky commends the government for the efforts made for the implementation of laws enacting mental health regulations. For him, this is a big step towards what we can achieve as a nation regarding the issue of mental health here. But there is more to address than the nationwide concern. His concern was coming from the grassroots perspective on the issue of mental health.
Just like any other condition, mental health conditions must be properly addressed in the smallest unit. Family. Talk about it with your family for they are the ultimate support group. Funding for mental health facilities and psychiatric needs are imperative in catering to the needs of the people regarding the issue of mental health.
During this Mental Health Awareness month, may this story embark on the importance of acceptance in our lives. Acceptance of the condition of others. Acceptance of the condition of yourself.
This may serve as a reminder to break the stigma surrounding mental health discourse. Mr. Ricky Ducas' story is a manifestation that mental health issues have no face. It chooses anyone and in anytime.
As Ricky says, be an advocate for life. These people seek help, not attention.
Edited by Andrew Diano
Commentaires